North Carolina Austins: Christmas Crap

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Christmas Crap

I'm not as bah-humbug as the title makes me seem. It was just the first thing that popped into my head. At first, I pushed it back a little and tried for 10 seconds to think of something punny, but then that seemed like too much effort. So, here is a little of the NC Austins Christmas Crap:

Helping Daddy make ginger bread for the ginger bread house. (I told him they sell a $9.99 kit for this type of project at every drug store.)

Bedtime stories by the light of the tree.

And cross decorating cookies off the list!

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Libby and I had steal cut oats for breakfast this morning.

me: Do you want bananas on yours? I'm having bananas on mine.

Lib: No. I want honey on mine. I like honey. I like honey on Scottish biscuits.

me: What's a Scottish biscuit?

Lib: You know, you put them in the toaster.

me: English muffin?

Lib: Yeah, that's it.

Libby does a lot of singing. We are currently stuck on Katy Perry's Roar album. Back when we used to be able to listen to the radio on the way to school, she'd have great comments on the lyrics to songs.

You know that song- "I'm never gonna dance again, guilty feet have got no rhythm..." Then it goes, "Should've known better than to "cheetah" friend", and she laughs and says she wishes she had a cheetah friend.

Another time, she commented that "you really can't rock and roll all night, but you could party every day."

And finally, if you know Libby, you know she has a little 'lovey' monkey that she has slept with every night of her life. We were listening to The Beastie Boys, Brass Monkey, and there's a line, " wherever we go, we bring monkey with us". She thought that was great, "Hey Mommy, me too!"

This afternoon, we were over at Grandma and GB's. Libby asked Grandma is she'd get "that cat fun dip" out.

As the new holiday tradition of Chenekah was being established, we were trying to come up with a 'theme song' or Chenekah carol. Maggie was getting impatient with our singing, and shouts out, "Oh for Christ's Cake! Let's just open the present!" The baking of the Christ Cake....and another Chenekah tradition begins!

At the dinner table, both girls like to have a chance to say their own special blessing. Tonight, Libby was especially thankful. "Thank you, God, for Daddy's favorite (dinner), and the beans. And all my family. And the napkins. And money. Amen. And the Steelers."

Libby just came up to me and said, "Mommy, I want to go somewhere else." And I asked, "where would you like to go?"

"To my bed."

Almost 3 years old, and a good hour before the usual bedtime!

I'm sure every mother can sympathize with my lack of alone time in the bathroom. I was getting into the shower this morning and Libby says,"Whoa. You have big boobies." I smile politely. Then she continues, "They look like meatballs!"

Age 2 1/2

Maggie received an invitation to a birthday party for one of her friends from preschool. The next day in school, all the mothers were hanging around the classroom getting ready for a field trip to the park. As the teacher was trying to quiet everyone down and get the morning started, Maggie calls out to her friend, "Hey Nathan! I'm a big fan of that Chucky Cheese party!"

Age 5

I usually buy generic diapers, or if I happen to find a good deal, we get the Huggies brand with Mickey Mouse on them. Recently, I bought the Pampers with Sesame Street gang print. I put one on Libby last night and she says, " I see Elmo. Who's those guys?" Before I could answer, she asks, " Nerdy and Bert?"

At the $2 movies watching the beginning of Puss in Boots, where they show an intriguing 'fiesta del fuego' somewhere in Spain. Maggie says, "Don't they have fun in Mexican?!?!"

Libby, dressed in her Steelers gear, about to eat some playoff snacks, starts singing to the tune of "O Christmas Tree"...

"Oh chicken wing, oh chicken wing!" Jan.2012

The girls were hanging around on the diving boards at the pool while some bigger kids were throwing a football and catching it as they went off the boards. The lifeguard asked them to not throw the ball with the little kids around. Maggie marched up on the board and said, "I'm all bigged up! They must be talking about Libby." One of the 12ish year old boys got a real kick out of that.

"Is that Annie all grown up?", Maggie asked as we turned the channel to the movie Napolean Dynamite.

Maggie: "Some Daddys have hair, and some don't."
Mommy: "My Daddy has hair."
Maggie: "Only the sticking up kind, like this." (motioning wild hair)
Daddy: "Does my Daddy have any hair?"
Maggie: "Only just a little bit, right by his ears."

"If there's another Maggie in this country, I'll just change my name to Pam"

I asked Maggie what happened to the head band that she was wearing when she went to school one morning. She told me it broke. I asked her if she lost her temper, and she replied, "Mommy, I think I lost all of my tempers!" Like mother, like daughter.

Maggie overheard me make a comment to Rob about it being a great Saturday afternoon for tailgating. A couple of hours later she says, " I think I want to do some tail getting." I asked her what that entails, and she replied, " You sit right here in the grass and wait for your tail to grow."

"Mommy, will you tell me about that sign that has a nortado on it?" Maggie, 3 1/2

"Those aren't farts...those are rockets!" Maggie, 3 1/2

"If you kiss with your head this way (tilted to one side) that means you're in love." Maggie, age 3

"Is heaven a rectangle state?" Maggie, age 3

"It's great packer snow out there, I'm going to make a big, big big, big fat snowman". Maggie, age 2

North Carolina Austins

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Christmas Crap

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